F-Word

"fuck |fək| vulgar slang
verb [ trans. ]
1 have sexual intercourse with (someone).
• [ intrans. ] (of two people) have sexual intercourse.
2 ruin or damage (something).
noun
an act of sexual intercourse.
• [with adj. ] a sexual partner.
exclamation
used alone or as a noun ( the fuck) or a verb in various phrases to express anger, annoyance, contempt, impatience, or surprise, or simply for emphasis.
PHRASES
go fuck yourself an exclamation expressing anger or contempt for, or rejection of, someone.
not give a fuck ( about) used to emphasize indifference or contempt.
PHRASAL VERBS
fuck around spend time doing unimportant or trivial things. • have sexual intercourse with a variety of partners. • ( fuck around with) meddle with.
fuck off [usu. in imperative ] (of a person) go away.
fuck someone over treat someone in an unfair or humiliating way.
fuck someone up damage or confuse someone emotionally.
fuck something up (or fuck up) do something badly or ineptly.
DERIVATIVES
fuckable adjective
ORIGIN early 16th cent.: of Germanic origin (compare Swedish dialect focka and Dutch dialect fokkelen); possibly from an Indo-European root meaning [strike,] shared by Latin pugnus ‘fist.’
USAGE Despite the wideness and proliferation of its use in many sections of society, the word fuck remains (and has been for centuries) one of the most taboo words in English. Until relatively recently, it rarely appeared in print; even today, there are a number of euphemistic ways of referring to it in speech and writing, e.g., the F-word, f***, or f—k."

That was, obviously, the official dictionary definition for the word fuck. Fuck is one of my favorite words, really, and I've been defending the widespread use of it vehemently for years now. I'm sure most people think I enjoy the word and use it so often because I'm an extremely vulgar person, which is not true at all in my eyes. (Vulgarity is a pretty relative thing, though, and it depends on how delicate the sensibilities are of the person that's judging you.) I use it so often because I like to think of myself as passionate, and I can think of no better way to express pretty much any extreme emotion that I'm feeling at any given time. Except love, because even I would hesitate to say something like, "I fucking love you." You've got to draw the line somewhere.

I also really appreciate versatility, and like guys who play on both sides of the ball in the NFL (Deon Sanders) and women that have a nice ass and also enjoy reading, fuck is extremely versatile. I'm prepared to say it's the most versatile word in the English language, and it's great (or fucking great) that when someone uses it, you can always immediately discern what they mean by it. There is no other word with so many meanings that so easily lacks ambiguity whenever it's uttered or screamed; whether it's used as an adjective, verb or noun.

For example, say a Nickelback comes on the radio while you're driving somewhere with a group of your friends. You might say something like, "Ah, change it right now. I fucking hate Nickelback worse than any band to ever perform." Upon hearing this, your friends will immediately know that you dislike Nickelback, which is a sentiment you could've easily conveyed without using the word fuck, but it adds an unparalleled degree of emphasis to the word. Your friends know now that you have a really extremely passionate dislike for this band, and that they probably shouldn't play any of their songs around you because a) you will start complaining immediately, and b) you will never hang out with them again. If you would've just said "I hate Nickelback," they'd put that group on the same level as, say, Green Day, who are pretty bad, but definitely not as fucking terrible as Nickelback.

If they keep the song on, and you realize that it's really not that bad (I assure you this will never, ever fucking happen), you might say something like "Holy fuck, this song isn't that bad." Again, the fuck isn't absolutely necessary, but it definitely carries more resonance than if you were to say something like "Holy cow," or "Holy Toledo." If you say something like that, then they'll probably just laugh at you and call you a douchebag. Believe me.

If the conversation continues about Nickelback--because there's always that one kid that's trying to tell you that they really aren't that bad because he's either people that say "Oh, I like everything" or just has exceptionally bad taste --you might get onto the topic of their lead singer, who goes by the name of Chad Kroeger and has the worst haircut I've ever seen in my entire life. You'll probably say something like, "God, if I ever saw that leather-pants-wearing talentless piece of shit in person, I'd probably want to fuck his shit up." Your friends immediately know that you mean you would not mind fighting Chad Kroeger (you might say is kind of an odd sentiment, to want to fight somebody because they make terrible music; if you are saying that, then you've probably never heard much Nickelback). They immediately know that you don't want to actually have sex with the guy, and that's why fuck is so awesome. It's got a clarity to it that other words with multiple meanings can't even touch. Think about it: if you would've said "If I ever saw Chad Kroeger, I'd slam him," then there might be a little bit of confusion over whether you actually want to slam him to the ground, or ram him in the ass. You don't want that kind of confusion at all, especially in circumstances as delicate as that. If you ever imply that you want to have sex with a member of Nickelback, you will probably immediately lose any and all credibility as a stable human being that your friends have ever awarded you.

I think you see what I'm trying to get at, here.

Another thing I really like about the fuck word is that you can use it to express a number of emotions simultaneously. I don't think there's another word in the English language that can actually do that. Say you find out your ex-girlfriend cheated on you with some dude from Miami Ink. You can express surprise, anger, contempt, etc. in regards to hearing that news by simply saying "What the fuck?" or "You've got to be fucking kidding me." Something like that.

Now, as you've read in the dictionary definition above, it says that fuck is still a pretty taboo word that rarely makes it to print, and is not really socially acceptable to say it in public. It's especially bad to say it around little kids. I think the only reason for this, though, is because people make it seem bad; or at least a lot worse than it really actually is. The truth of the matter--from my experience, anyway--is that people really don't use it all that often in conjunction to it's original meaning, which is to say sexually. If we actually started using it frequently, like at the dinner table or in children's books, then we might be able to someday eliminate it as a sexual term altogether. If fuck becomes a commonplace word that can be used exclusively to describe a broad range of emotions and not intercourse, then it can be used all the time to promote brevity and description, and not lose one ounce of its power as a word. People can say fuck at the dinner table, and not worry about being reprimanded. Talk about utopia.

I just think that times are definitely changing, and that the commonly-accepted vernacular should change with them. Our society is obviously more open to things that were once considered vulgar but have now become commonplace, like premarital sex or a nationally televised lingerie fashion show. Why can't fuck join that group?

In conclusion, fuck is an awesome word. Use it to your advantage.